Elopement vs. Small Wedding vs. Traditional Large Wedding
You have been together for years, your love has never been stronger, and your partner (finally!) popped the question! Now what? You begin to ask yourself: what do I want in a wedding day? Say a quick "I do" with just the two of you. Maybe it's getting married on Christmas Eve in the desert with twenty loved ones in attendance. Or perhaps you are dreaming of having a fall wedding outside in front of the mountains with all of your favorite people. Whatever your preference, consider these three different types of wedding days before plotting out your plans.
The Size
of an elopement vs Small wedding vs traditional wedding
Some couples choose to elope with the two of them. It's romantic and simple - just the two of you, on your own and a few witnesses depending on your state requirements. In Colorado you can self-solemnize your marriage so you don't need anyone but the two of you.
Others prefer to have a small wedding with a small group of friends and family, opting to spend time and include those closest to them. A small wedding can have parts of the day that feel more like an elopement with the two of you, while also having the opportunity to celebrate with the people closest to you.
Then there are those that want to have an elaborate large wedding to celebrate with all of their friends and family. This type of wedding is great because it allows you to celebrate with everyone that has supported you throughout your relationship.
The Intimacy
of an elopement vs Small wedding vs traditional wedding
No two people are alike, and this is especially true for what you imagine your wedding day to feel like.
An elopement is typically less stressful because there are fewer people involved in the planning process (which means fewer opinions!). Also, since it's not as big as a traditional wedding, it doesn't require as much time or money spent on decorations or other elements that go into making a large event feel special. A lot of people (hi, it's me) want to elope because they can't imagine being the center of attention for an entire day.
A small wedding allows you to get all the benefits of a traditional ceremony without having to worry about whether or not everyone will be able to attend. If you have a very tight-knit group of friends or family members who would love nothing more than to see you tie the knot, but can't afford or simply don't want to travel for an extended period of time, this may be a good option for you!
A traditional large wedding is often seen as a more extravagant way to celebrate your love, but it also comes with a lot more planning (and sometimes stress).
With large weddings, there are more people to see and spend time with (especially your uncle Tim who came all the way from Italy!) so there is less time for you to spend together or with close friends and family.
The Planning
of an elopement vs Small wedding vs traditional wedding
The planning of eloping is a lot simpler than the planning of a traditional or small wedding. You do not need to worry about booking large venues, catering 100 people or entertainment. However, this does not mean that you can't still include those aspects into your elopement day for just the two of you. But you have fewer people involved with your elopement and therefore less work to do when it comes to organizing. You can also elope spur of the moment or last minute as all you need to coordinate with is each other.
The planning of small weddings are similar to elopements in some ways but are also very different in others. With small weddings, there are usually more people involved than there would be with an elopement but they are still quite simple affairs when compared with traditional weddings. There may be more emphasis placed on guests when it comes to micro weddings but they are much easier to organize.
Planning a larger wedding usually comes with a bit more planning that has to happen most often times a whole 12 months, ahead of time. Some things you'll find at a traditional wedding includes: venue, catering, planner, invitations, decorations, attire, guest gifts, flowers.
The Guest List
of an elopement vs Small wedding vs traditional wedding
When you elope, the guest list is just the two of you. You're getting married in a way that's intimate and personal, so why invite anyone else?!
If you want to invite more people, you can have an intimate or small wedding with just the two of you and your closest loved ones.
And when it comes to larger traditional weddings, anything goes! Most people try to keep it at a limited number depending on catering or venue capacity but often include extended guests, whole families, and plus ones.
The Size
of an elopement vs Small wedding vs traditional wedding
If you're looking to get married in a beautiful location with just the two of you (and sometimes a witness), eloping is your best option as your options are endless! You can hike to your location, you can get married at a brewery, you can go somewhere exotic, you can even get married in an airplane hangar!
If you want to have a small wedding, you'll need space for the ceremony and reception—and some locations may have guest capacity limits in order to follow Leave No Trace rules and ethics, and to not disturb other visitors. Your photographer should be able to help you find cheaper or free locations that allow more guests, but most places impose a limit of under 20 guests.
Large traditional weddings are usually held at church or wedding venues that can comfortably accommodate a large number of guests. But with larger gatherings, it's hard to find low-cost options and most often end up taking a big chunk out of the budget. However, this is where a wedding planner can come in and help save you time and energy by compiling rates of wedding venues for you!
The Cost
of an elopement vs Small wedding vs traditional wedding
Everyone assumes that a large traditional wedding costs more than an elopement, but the truth is that you can design and personalize either event to fit your budget. :)
Other Options
Incorporating different aspects of All 3
If you're not sold on the idea of exclusively eloping, having a small wedding, or having a large traditional wedding—there are other options. This is where you can let your creativity shine by completely customizing your wedding day! You can:
Have a ceremony with just the two of you, then celebrate with friends and family afterwards (either later that day or on a different day)
Elope with just the two of you, then have a small intimate wedding with your loved ones at another time so you don't have to choose between intimacy and a larger celebration (this is what I did!).
Have loved ones attend your ceremony, then head off solo with your partner to spend the rest of the day together.
Have a large traditional wedding with your loved ones, then have a day after adventure with just the two of you in your wedding attire. You can personalize the day by reading vows, or incorporating other traditions to help it feel more like another wedding day.
Elopement Pros & Cons
Pros:
Can be planned last minute
Just the two of you
Can go with the flow and change locations because of weather/road closures/etc
You get to spend the day prioritizing what is important to you
You can elope pretty much anywhere
Cons:
Can be overwhelming with all of the options available
Can be less structured if you don’t have a good photographer to help you
Other people can have opinions on your choice
Small wedding Pros & Cons
Pros:
You get to spend time with each other and celebrate with loved ones (cue “The Best Of Both Worlds” by Miley Cyrus!)
You have a lot of options for ceremony locations with a small number of guests
Cons:
Less location options available because you’ll need to accommodate a larger group
Have to accommodate other people
Can be less structured if you don’t have a good photographer to help you
Large Wedding Pros & Cons
Pros:
A day of people celebrating you then a party celebrating with your people
Seeing people you don’t see as often as you would like
You get to go all out and have the day of your dreams
Cons:
Takes more planning and needs to be planned months out
Unable to spend quality time with your guests
Can be more expensive
Can cause more stress with the number of things you (feel like) you have to do
Deciding between eloping, having a small wedding, and having a large traditional wedding is one of the most profound decisions that a couple can make together. For some people, it's the culmination of years of dreaming and planning. For others, it's surprisingly spur of the moment or even a last minute decision. Whichever you choose, there are pros and cons to each option that should be weighed against each other before deciding which is right for you as a couple.
I truly love working with couples, helping them create a vision and plan towards it. I believe in an elopement or small wedding as much as a large traditional wedding. This is YOUR day--you get to choose what works best for you!
I'm here to explore ideas and discuss options with you!
Looking to have an elopement experience that you can look back on and know you wouldn’t change a single thing about?
Howdy, I’m Kimberly!
I’m s Colorado elopement and wedding photographer that’s committed countless hours chasing sunrises and making dinner in the back of my car while perfecting my craft (while getting some lenses really dusty and wet along the way), and capturing images that make people feel something.
